I WON

by Stephanie Remsing

Stephanie, a rhabdomyosarcoma survivor, wrote this poem when she was 12 years old. She is 15 years old now. Her Mom and Dad told us, "This was written during Stephanie's lowest point during treatment. She was down to 45 pounds from 62 pounds, bedridden, unable to eat, barely able to see, and being fed thru a g-tube. We think it was her inspiration of hope that she was going to win the battle."

What are you looking at? Haven’t you ever seen the face of a survivor before? Have you never seen the face of a real winner? For over a year, I fought a long and valiant battle of a deadly cancer that had taken over my body, and I WON.

There was a time when I could neither eat or drink, because of the radiation and chemotherapy affects on my body, and I dropped down to 42 pounds. But I fought a long and valiant battle, till I was able to eat and drink again, and I WON.

There were times I was hospitalized for extended periods of time, because of an infection that normally would not be serious, but because of my depleted red and white blood cell counts, could have been deadly for me. I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

For over a year, I was very sick, nauseated, on a daily basis, usually all day long, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

I went thru a period of time where I had to literally fight for each and every breath I took,
but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

I went thru a period of time when I could not walk because of the affects of
chemotherapy on my body, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

I went thru a period of time when I was unable to speak, not even to tell my Dad and
Mom just how much I loved them, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

For 28 straight days, my head was bolted down to a table, so that I could not move during
radiation treatments, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

I went thru a period of time when it was almost impossible for me to see because of the
effects of chemotherapy on my body, but I fought a long and valiant battle,and I WON.

I went thru many initial diagnostic tests on a daily basis for over a week, scared to death
because I did not know what was happening, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

I went thru a period of time when I did not know if I was going to be alive to see my Dad
and Mom the next day, but I fought a long and valiant battle, and I WON.

My hair may be a bit shorter than yours, but I am very proud of each and every one of
them, because each and every one of them show you I WON.

I still wear braces on my legs to help me walk because of the affects of chemotherapy on
my body, but I am walking, because I WON.

I am a survivor, and I WON.